i've been waiting for something

I've never thought of success as the color of a ribbon. I've never needed to place in order to feel accomplished.

My success is found in a horse who stands quietly when I pull his mane. Cantering bareback in an open field. Finally being able to jump down the steps.

So why should I drop $500 to spend the last month I have with my horse stressing out over whether or not we'll finally be "good enough?"

Not that I don't like showing. I do. But it's so much money. So much money with no guarantee that it won't be like Catalpa last year. So much stress. Unnecessary stress. Pressure. And after all that, we'll be lucky if we place 10th.

Going to watch the mini-event today made me realize that I love hanging out and helping people and taking loads of pictures almost as much as I like actually showing.

I'd rather spend money on cross-country schooling trips. Cheaper, less stressful, and I can sneak in a few prelim jumps :)

I am excited to watch Freedom compete with his new owner and other leaser. To me, their success is my success. I love watching him calmly jump a course with one of them. I reminisce a lot, perhaps too much, about what he was like when I was their age. I was doubtful that he would ever be where he is now.